Your AOL bill is more than your phone bill.
You get more e-mail than snail mail.
When introducing yourself to anyone, you use your screen name.
You understand what BIM, BIF, ISO, M4M, or F4F means.
You are no longer afraid of a mouse.
You're awake for a lot of sunrises.
You go up to people you are attracted to and ask for their GIF.
You don't even know what your cyberfriends look like.
When your spouse is mad at you, they threaten to erase your
e-mail, and you humbly, earnestly, and quickly beg for
At work, your boss constantly reminds you that the letter "i"
should be capitalized.
When going on a job interview and asked if have any questions
about the company, your first response is to ask if they
are on AOL.
When leaving to go to the bathroom, you find yourself saying,
When meeting a stranger, you ask for their profile.
If they have none, you ask for an age\sex\location check.
Your spouse now complains of you moving your fingers in your
sleep instead of talking.
You dream in text.
Tech support calls YOU for help!
You watch TV with the sound off and the close-captioning on.
You double-click your remote.
You beg your friends to go online so you can "hang out".
You have over 100 people on your buddy list.
You sign on and immediately get ten IMs from people that have
you on their buddy lists.
You have a vanity tag with your screenname on it.
You no longer use capital letters, proper punctuation, or
complete sentences Your English teacher is spinning in
You type over 70 WPM.
You type faster than you think Three words: Carpal Tunnel
You change screennames so much that you have to check your
profile to figure out who you are.
You have a second phone line just for your computer.
You type messages to people while you're talking to them on the
You smile sideways.
You spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to
everyone before signing off.
You bring a bag lunch to your computer.
You go through AOL withdrawal during dinner.
You wake up and let your computer boot up before making coffee
You got your psychiatrist addicted to AOL and are now undergoing
therapy in private rooms instead of his/her office.
When you die, you want your computer buried with you.
When your computer dies, YOU want to be buried with it.
Being called a "Newbie" is a MAJOR insult.
You enjoy being called an AOL addict. "
You understand the humor in all of these jokes