If AOL Made Cars
- The AOL car would have a TOP speed of 40 MPH yet have a 200 MPH speedometer.
- The AOL car would come equipped with a NEW and fantastic 8-track tape player.
- The car would often refuse to start and owners would just expect this and
try again later.
- The windshield would have an extra dark tint to protect the driver from
seeing better cars.
- AOL would sell the same model car year after year and claim it was the
- Every now and then the brakes on the AOL car would just "lock-up"
for no apparent reason.
- The AOL car would have a very plain body style but would have lots of
pretty colors and lights.
- The AOL car would have only one door but it would have 5 extra seats for
- Anyone dissatisfied could return the car but must continue to make
payments for 6 months.
- If an AOL car owner received 3 parking tickets AOL would take the car away.
- The AOL car would have an AOL cell phone that can place calls only to
other AOL car cell phones.
- AOL would pass a new car law forbidding AOL car owners from driving near
other car dealerships.
- AOL car mechanics would have no experience in car repair.
- Younger AOL car drivers would be able to make other people's AOL cars stall
just for fun.
- It would not be possible to upgrade your AOL car stereo.
- AOL cars would be forced to use AOL gasoline that cost 20% more and gave
- Anytime an AOL car owner saw another AOL car owner he would
wonder: M/F , age?
- It would be common for AOL car owners to divorce just to marry another
AOL car owner.
- AOL car owners would always claim to be older or younger than they really
- AOL cars would come with a steering wheel and AOL would claim no other
cars have them.
- Every time you close the door on the AOL car it would say "good-bye."