If Xerox made toasters, you could brown one side at a time or both sides at once or 100 slices in succession. But you'd have to call for a repair tech at least once a day.
lf Timex made toasters, they might not be too pretty, but they'd keep working no matter how many times you dropped them.
If the Franklin Mint made toasters, you'd receive a new installment in the Americana Toaster Series every other month.
If Sam's Club made toasters, they'd be cheaper than any other toaster on the market -- as long as you bought them by the dozen.
If Sony made toasters, they'd run on batteries, include a clip for easy attachment to your belt, and be the same dimensions as the average slice of bread -- but they'd cost more than any two larger models put together.
If Microsoft made toasters, you'd have to buy a new one every time you bought a loaf of bread -- whether you wanted it or not. And even though all your friends would say they hate Microsoft toasters, they'd all have one because the best breads only toast in a Microsoft.