1. Indecision is the key to flexibility.
  2. You cannot tell which way the train went by looking at the track.
  3. There is absolutely no substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.
  4. This is as bad as it can get, but don't bet on it.
  5. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

  6. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
  7. The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.
  8. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
  9. Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world.
  10. Things are more like they are today than they ever have been before.

  11. Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.
  12. Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.
  13. Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
  14. I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
  15. The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.

  16. If you can smile when things go wrong, you've got someone in mind to blame.
  17. One-seventh of your life is spent on Monday.
  18. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
  19. Never wrestle with a pig: you both get all dirty, and the pig likes it.
  20. The trouble with life is, you're halfway through it before you realize it's a "do it yourself" thing.