A closed mouth gathers no feet.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
A king's castle is his home.
A penny saved is ridiculous.
All that glitters has a high refractive index.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Anarchy is better that no government at all.
Any small object when dropped will hide under a larger object.
Automobile - A mechanical device that runs up hills and down people.

Brain -- the apparatus with which we think that we think.

Computer programmers don't byte, they nybble a bit.
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.

Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.
Death is Nature's way of saying 'slow down'.
Do something unusual today. Accomplish work on the computer.
Don't force it, get a larger hammer.
Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.
Drive defensively -- buy a tank.

Earn cash in your spare time -- blackmail friends.

Familiarity breeds children.

God didn't create the world in 7 days. He pulled an all-nighter on the 6th.
Going the speed of light is bad for your age.

He who hesitates is sometimes saved.
History does not repeat itself, -- historians merely repeat each other.

If it is good, they will stop making it.
If you don't change your direction, you may end up where you were headed.
If you're not part of the solution, be part of the problem!
It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education. Albert Einstein
It works better if you plug it in.

Jury -- Twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer.

Life is what happens to you while you are planning to do something else.
Lynch's Law: When the going gets tough, everyone leaves.

Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research.

The road to success is always under construction.
Those who can't write, write help files (or computer manuals).
To be, or not to be, those are the parameters.
To err is human, to really foul things up requires a computer.
Today is the last day of your life so far.
TRAPEZOID - A device for catching zoids.

Wasting time is an important part of life.
When all else fails, read the instructions.
When in doubt, don't bother.
When in doubt, ignore it.

Xerox does it again and again and again and...