12. "Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick handy?"

11. "...that's right, not even McGyver could fix it."

10. "So -- what are you wearing?"

09. "Duuuuuude! Bummer!"

08. "Looks like you're gonna need some new dilythium crystals, Cap'n."

07. "Press 1 for Support.
      Press 2 if you're with 60 Minutes.
      Press 3 if you're with the FTC."

06. "We can fix this, but you're gonna need a butter knife,
      a roll of duct tape, and a car battery."

05. "I'm sorry, Dave.   I'm afraid I can't do that."

04. "In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."

03. "Hold on a second... Mom!   Timmy's hitting me!"

02. "Okay, turn to page 523 in your copy of Dianetics.

01. "Please hold for Mr. Gates' attorney."