1. You have spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.
2. You consider a sixpack and a bug zapper quality entertainment.
3. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
4. You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
5. Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.

6. Your father encouraged you to quit school because Larry had an opening on the lube rack.
7. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
8. You have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.
9. The directions to your house include "turn off the paved road".
10. Your dog and your wallet are both on chains.

11. Your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mudflaps.
12. You owe the taxidermist more than your annual income.
13. You have lost at least one tooth opening a beer bottle.
14. Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people".
15. Your wife's hairdo has been ruined by a ceiling fan.

16. You won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
18. Your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
19. You have a Hefty bag on the passenger side window of your car.
20. You barbecue Spam on the grill.

21. You consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it.
22. Your brother-in-law is your uncle.
23. Redman sends you a Christmas card.
24. You bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.
25. Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.

26. You view your next family reunion as a good chance to meet girls.
27. You prominently display the gift you got at Graceland.
28. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
29. You call your boss "Dude".
30. You have started a petition to change the National Anthem to "Country Roads" (West Virginia ... Mountain Mama ...)