10. How do I know anything really exists?
-Kick it *really* hard.
9. What is the essence of being human?
-Not understanding the opposite sex.
8. If a tree falls in the forest, and there's no one there to
hear it, does it make a sound?
-Not if it lands on a bunch of pillows.
7. How do I know I'm not just a brain in a vat, hooked up to a
computer simulation of life?
-Look in the mirror. If you see a gray, spongy thing in
a glass container, you are.
6. Can our minds exist seperately from our bodies?
-If they could, we'd just send our minds to class and
sleep in every morning.
5. Is there a God?
-A billion Hindus can't be wrong.
4. What is the nature of Knowledge?
-I'm still trying to figure out the nature of *college*.
3. What is the meaning of life?
-All evidence to date suggests it's chocolate.
2. Why get a Philosophy degree?
-It's more respectable than a theater degree, but you
still get to drink lots of espresso.
1. So, was Kant on drugs or what?
-Probably.