1. "Vacation" means spending a day at King's Dominion or Busch Gardens.
2. "Going to the River" means any stream with water.
3. Down south to you means points farther than South Carolina.
4. Your school classes were canceled because of cold.
5. Your school classes were canceled because of heat.
6. You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way.
7. You've had to switch from "heat" to A/C" in the same day.
8. You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition.
Example: "Where's
my coat at?"
9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave them both
unlocked.
10. You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer and Jell-O
salad with marshmallows.
11. You have never been served tea without the waitress asking "sweet or
unsweetened?"
12. You carry jumper cables in your car.
13. Driving may be better in the winter because the potholes are sometimes
filled with snow.
14. You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie.
15. The local paper covers state, national and international headlines in one
page but sports requires six pages.
16. You think the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
17. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
18. You find 50 degrees F "a little chilly".
19. You know all 4 seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and highway
construction.
20. You know if another Virginian is from eastern, central or western Virginia
as soon as he opens his mouth.
21. You can spell words such as Mattaponi, Pamunkey and Chincoteaque.
22. Your favorite past time is telling West Virginia jokes.
23. Anyone who can't trace his or her ancestry back to at least four
generations in Virginia is an outsider.
24. You entertain your kids on a trip by having them try to see which one can
spot the most confederate flags on pickup trucks.
25. Red Man is the dessert choice of 40% of the men (and 10% of the women).
26. BBQ stands for "bobbycue".
27. The left lane of a divided highway is the "through", or driving lane, and
the right lane is for passing.
28. "Going to the beach" means anywhere from Virginia Beach to Myrtle Beach.
29. The highlight of your week is a night without soccer, baseball or football
games for the kids and no club, church or PTA meetings.
30. You actually get most of these jokes and forward them to all your Virginia
friends.
********Y'all come back, yahear